Tuesday, February 27, 2007
The buy an old pickup truck diet (tm)
This diet is effective due to the multiple ways it forces you to eat less. You may not be feel the effects of every facet of this diet but, rest assured, it will get you.
Step 1) Buy an old pickup truck
Step 2) Say you are going to drive it like it is
Step 3) Ignore Step 2
Step 4) Fix problem "i" -- spend money
Step 5) Realize Step 4 did not help
Step 6) Work on problem more -- spend money
Step 7) Recognize new problem made apparent by fixing old problem
Step 8) "i++" Go back to Step 4, if starved to death, goto Step 9
Step 9) Exit diet
This diet is most effective if you 1) know how to do most of the work yourself, and 2) are totally broke. If you know how to do the work yourself you will try to save money by doing the work, and may even succeed, but will have no time to eat. You will also spend all of your limited funds on parts. But, as noted earlier, this diet is also effect for multiple reasons. If you do not know how to do the work yourself, then you will have to pay someone to do the work for you. This will not only cost you money for parts, but also for labor. You will still have time to eat, but even less money for eating.
This diet is brought to you by Ph.D. Students and Associates (c).
Step 1) Buy an old pickup truck
Step 2) Say you are going to drive it like it is
Step 3) Ignore Step 2
Step 4) Fix problem "i" -- spend money
Step 5) Realize Step 4 did not help
Step 6) Work on problem more -- spend money
Step 7) Recognize new problem made apparent by fixing old problem
Step 8) "i++" Go back to Step 4, if starved to death, goto Step 9
Step 9) Exit diet
This diet is most effective if you 1) know how to do most of the work yourself, and 2) are totally broke. If you know how to do the work yourself you will try to save money by doing the work, and may even succeed, but will have no time to eat. You will also spend all of your limited funds on parts. But, as noted earlier, this diet is also effect for multiple reasons. If you do not know how to do the work yourself, then you will have to pay someone to do the work for you. This will not only cost you money for parts, but also for labor. You will still have time to eat, but even less money for eating.
This diet is brought to you by Ph.D. Students and Associates (c).
# posted by chilort @ 10:09 PM 
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You forgot step 1.5- convince girlfriend that said old truck is cheaper and easier to fix.
and step 7.5- ignore girlfriend and fail to participate in housework
I also think this would be made cleaner by a for loop.
and step 7.5- ignore girlfriend and fail to participate in housework
I also think this would be made cleaner by a for loop.
Step 1.5 is not necessarily a part of the diet. But along with step 7.5, there is a call to the "Forced to sleep outside in the tent" function. Luckily the girlfriend is engaged in her own program of "working all the time."
I do still think step 1.5 is true. It is cheaper and easier to fix an old one. You just have to do it more often, at least, until the bugs are worked out (I hope). Anything over 10 years old will be problematic.
A for loop would be cleaner, but I'm a crappy programmer. That's why I am in management now.
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I do still think step 1.5 is true. It is cheaper and easier to fix an old one. You just have to do it more often, at least, until the bugs are worked out (I hope). Anything over 10 years old will be problematic.
A for loop would be cleaner, but I'm a crappy programmer. That's why I am in management now.
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